Power Boob

Hey!

Do you wannabe

So stacked?

Try Power Boob.

Energy drinks for people who need

Gratuitous amounts of cleavage.

With all new flavors like

Jiggolate.

Jiggolate energy, it’s like adding jiggling

To an electrical storm.

Sound the alarm, you’re gonna be

Uncomfortably well-endowed.

What’s that?

You want strawberry?

Well how about

Braberry?

Made with lightning,

real lightning.

Sports (aaahhhhhh!) You’ll be good at them.

It’s an energy drink for women.

Womenergy.

These aren’t your momma’s fun bags,

these are energy bags.

Turbobags.

Science, boobage, science, boobage, electrolyes, turbolytes, powerlytes,

More lights than your body has room for.

You’ll be jiggling so fast, mother nature will be like, “Sloooooowwww dooowwwwnn.”

And you’ll be like, “Fuck you!” and slap her in the face with your

Energy cans.

You’ll have so much boobage,

boobage (aaaahhhhh!) just running all the time.

Boobie running, boobie lifting, boobie sweeping, boobie dating, boobie eating, boobie laughing, boobie spawning babies. You’ll have so many babies.

400 babies.

Give Jiggolate to your babies and they’ll be good at sports.

Make your babies jiggle

Abnormally fast.

They’ll jiggle as fast as Swedes. People will watch them running and think they’re Swedes. They’ll jiggle as fast as Swedes, against actual Swedes, and it’ll be a tie, and they’ll get deported back to Sweden.

Hey, go with the sure thing.

Don’t gamble on your boobs.

Snake eyes!

Try Power Boob, the drink that will make you (aaahhh!) sports (aaahhh!).

There it is, your moment of Zen. Good-night!

-TheAndySan

Hmm, I don’t like that hyphen. Let’s try this again:

There it is, your moment of Zen. Good-night!

TheAndySan

There we go. Much better.

P.S: It’s been 1,511 days since I had a website.

Boobs: To Look Or Not To Look

That is the question. Sup guys, it’s TheAndySan hurr.

Today at Wal-Mart, I was faced with a decision: whether or not I should look at girls’ boobs while I’m working. Being a red-blooded man, the obvious answer would be yes and look moAr. However, chicks have rights too so I feel that looking might constitute as sexual harassment. I came up with the following answer: I should definitely look at girls’ boobs whether I’m working or not. Now before you ladies decide to jump me in the parking lot, here are my reasons:

1 – It’s human nature. The human male is genetically programmed to find an ideal mate; one with large breasts for nursing children. Also, having large breasts shows that the female in question is healthy. Of course, there are limits to the size of the breasts. Having too large of breasts might indicate that the female is overweight and thus the children will be overweight.

2 – Girls like to show them off. Why do they show off the goods if they don’t want guys to look at their racks? It’s because, contrary to popular belief, girls WANT us to look at their boobs. It makes them feel sexually appealing and gives them attention.

So there you have it. I will continue to eyeball chicks’ dirty pillows wherever I am.

Well, I’m gonna go over to Eriopolis’ house so I’ll see you guys later. Bye now!

TheAndySan

P.S: It’s been 1,509 days since I had a website.